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Marin Couples / Marriage Counseling (Larkspur)

Update 4/6/21: I am offering limited in-office sessions starting this month on Thursdays, with proof of vaccination. 

Your relationship health is important, just as important as your emotional health. There are many reasons people struggle to have satisfying, secure and loving relationships.  Couples therapy / counseling can help you and your partner learn to take responsibility for what you each bring into the relationship, remove obstacles, learn new patterns and heal any past relational pain through each other.

If you are here, you are likely having some type of struggle in an important relationship.  Many problems can lead to disconnection and loneliness or general relationship dissatisfaction.  I help people learn to build trust, clear out resentments and rebuild emotional safety.

I’m here to help you get your relationship back on track (and also work with friends and duo family members such as siblings, parent/adult children, etc).

People are complicated and multi-layered, a compilation of personal historical experiences and the ways they’ve experienced relationships in the past which is often very relevant to how they function in the present.  Some couples come to therapy with a lot of clarity around the work they’d like to do and others have different ideas of what the issues are but might not be aware of underlying belief systems, attachment styles or other relevant aspects of how people engage in intimate relationship.   Or you just know you’re not happy and are unclear why that is.

And there is a newer phenomenon where couples who come in who feel generally secure and function well but want to periodically do a tune-up to be sure they stay on track.

The following are areas of focus in my Marin couples therapy practice:

  • COVID-19 Related Concerns
  • Couples Communication
  • Infidelity
  • Emotional Safety
  • Resentment
  • Relationship Repair
  • Relationship Tune-Up

My therapy / counseling involves assessing the emotional safety between you.  I want to understand if you have unmet needs, what they are and how you communicate about them.  People mistakingly believe that high conflict couples are the most likely to split but it’s actually the couples who build up relationship pain without speaking about it, or sweep it under the rug.

I can help you disrupt negative cycles in your relationship and shore up your relationship foundation. Your relationship strengths are also identified as this will help to propel you forward.

“Devote yourself to your partner’s sense of safety and security and not simply to your idea about what that should be. What may make you feel safe and secure may not be what your partner requires from you. Your job is to know what matters to your partner and how to make him or her feel safe and secure.” – Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT

Habits and patterns in relationships can have their roots in childhood experiences in your family of origin.  When relevant, my couples counseling approach involves looking at both of your past experiences to understand what you each bring to your relationship:

  • Did each of you have loving, supportive role models?
  • Were you modeled reliability and trust?
  • What was the quality of your attachment to parents/primary caregivers?
  • Do either of you have unresolved trauma that impacts the relationship?
  • What have your prior relationships looked like?

I will challenge you to hold a mirror up to yourself and honestly assess what you bring into your relationship dynamic that doesn’t serve well.  This may not be evident to you at first but it’s an important piece of the work.

I am an eclectic therapist as my work involves pieces of attachment research, Emotionally Focused Therapy, the research of John Gottman, neuroscience and more.  Couples therapy can not only provide tools for your toolbox but a deeper understanding of your relationship dynamic, vulnerabilities and how to better attune to each other.

**NEW I also offer online therapy to those in San Diego, San Francisco, Santa Clara, Los Angeles, San Mateo and anywhere in California from my additional new telehealth site.

Not quite ready for couples therapy / counseling or out of the area?  Here are a few other useful tools.

The Marriage Refresher Course Workbook for Couples

My workbook for couples (married or in long term relationships) can help you strengthen your relationship foundation.  You can start with this and then if you would like to follow up with me, we’d have a good starting point.  Or it might be enough for you to make positive changes in your relationship on its own.   It’s available on my other website, LoveAndLifeToolbox.com.

Relationship Consultations

I offer Relationship Consultations for specific issues via email, phone or video.  This is not psychotherapy but educational for feedback and a suggested action plan. There are several Consultation options to suit your needs.

We’re ready to go, let’s do this!

Ready to schedule a Marin couples therapy appointment?

SCHEDULE A COUPLES THERAPY SESSION WITH LISA